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An Ode to a Two Gallon Container of Fine Chinese Liquor
For all those occasions when a normal-sized bottle just won’t impress
One day, while navigating a grocery store, I came across a vessel of high-proof alcohol the size of a propane tank, and of course I had to take a picture. I didn’t know what I might do with that picture, but I needed the memento.
I also don’t know what one would do with a vessel of high-proof alcohol the size of a propane tank. Well, apart from the obvious, of course — but what circumstances would call for such a thing in particular? How often does one need to arrange a drinking binge for four or five dozen of his closest friends? Might there not be an easier way to serve a large party than with a single 25+ pound vessel with smooth sides and no easy way to hoist it?
I’m overlooking the obvious, of course, which is that the impressive size is the entire point. To drive the point home on the size, this is 10 liters of baijiu, which — for those of you not well-versed in the metric system — is over two gallons. It isn’t the cheap stuff, either. This vessel costs in excess of $1300 dollars. Liter for liter, it’s not the most expensive you’re going to find, but it’s still pretty nice.
Was I surprised to see a $1300 dollar jug of alcohol in a grocery store? A little bit, maybe. One can find spirits in Chinese grocery stores, even imported spirits. It’s not rare to see a bottle of something selling well into the hundreds of dollars, and in your ritzier shops you might even see a half-gallon or so of Chivas or XO with a similarly bracing price tag.
There is, of course, no practical reason to own such a large bottle of those, either — but then, one doesn’t always buy such a product to use it. Many are the times I’ve seen pricey bottles of brandy sitting on shelves, seemingly untouched. I suspect that the owners of these bottles have no real appreciation for these spirits, but they have a keen appreciation for image. The poor want to look wealthy, and the wealthy want to look classy, and little says “class” in China quite like expensive spirits.
So there’s your explanation for this mammoth jar of fine alcohol. This is a product meant to draw the eye of a very specific image-conscious customer. It is a decorative object, one that tells the world “I can afford to spend what many people make in several months on a spirit that the great-grandkids will still be trying to finish.”
Conspicuous consumption is universal, it seems. Always remember that. Oh, and if you do get a chance to partake of such expensive spirits? I say go for it. I can’t guarantee it will be a good night, but it will certainly be an interesting one.
